Contemplation


HOH spoke of a punishment recently where I would have time to contemplate things. Its a while ago, but she started out with her part of her intentions.

I didn’t write about the events at the time as I was angered and at the same saddened by the events that lead up to this and given that I had to leave that day just added to the anger and frustration.

This is the third time I’ve drafted this post originally prepared in July, however something inside me stopped me from posting the previous ones.

A bit of background first.  Since about April and our Easter break, DD has slowly but surely been a smaller part of our lives.  There are a few reasons for this on both sides and I make no excuses for my part.  I continually get far too many requests for my time from my job, by contrast C gets too many demands from her family.

Without either of us recognising it we were back to drinking heavily, missing chores and doing the least we could get away with whilst at the same time letting each other down.   We deal with things differently – C is very vocal, I tend to become very withdrawn and sulky.  There has to be a safe place away from the stress and naturally found a friendy in the pub where we can have happy experiences and “blow off”.

Back to the C’s post:  The two things that C took exception to were drinking before eating late and not completing a list.    Of the two of these most would say that the former would be more important, however in the grand scheme of things I would put the list as more important.

I don’t have a problem with the reason behind the list.  Its every bit as important for me as it is for C, but the content of the list is where we have a problem.  We are poles apart with the list and that is the reason that C didn’t get her list.  The details are not important and C can probably tell you what I would like to have in it.   I was upset about this as I saw myself backed into a corner under the threat of discipline to make the content as C wanted it.  That is wrong and does not come anywhere close to our definition of DD where we agree things up front.   I will concede that upsetting C is something that we have agreed on.   We’ve already got together with a bottle of wine and discussed this one further as the implications behind this could be our ruin.

The having a drink and eating late whilst at site issue is also an issue for me, every night since I’ve returned home, with the exception of the night that I left, we have met at the pub and had a few drinks and eaten late.    We’ve also been doing it for most of the weeks, nay months, prior to this.   I think there may be another reason, but again that’s one for C and I to talk about.

So why so long since the last time we posted? I think that is reflective about the level of stress that we have in our lives just now and the amount of DD that we are not doing. Its a shame, there’s nothing like a good spanking to relieve the tension.

A

One comment on “Contemplation

  1. If it’s any consolation we’ve been going through the same work-related stress and it’s affected our DD relationship too.

    We’ve always taken time to discuss issues but even then things slipped and from February our DD has virtually been on hold.

    I agree with you that a good punishment session does relieve tension but first you need to discuss the issues and get things back on track.

    One thing I’ve noted from this post is you seem to be annoyed with C’s comments about drinking, eating late and not completing a list. If she is to be the dominant partner then should she not be allowed to make such observations – and you act on her comments. And if she’s not completed a list as you would have like, then you have to live with it until such time you can sit and talk things over.

    Likewise you say she is under pressure from her family. In your place as the sub male, should you not embrace this and help her cope with this, rather than use it as a reason for your DD relationship taking a dive?

    I think the whole idea of being a submissive in a female-led relations is wanting to bend to the will of the authoritarian lady. We might not always like her decisions but in choosing the lifestyle, surely we have to accept them?

    And one final comment: I used to become withdrawn and sulky in my former marriage and the post-row misery would last for days. But since I’ve been with Mistress and we had used DD, any hint of sulking in our house normally earns me a good dose of the cane. And of course our lifestyle means we never, ever have anything to row about.

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