Something I’ve been trying to about blog about happened a few weeks ago. I was moody, wanting to do my own thing and not really caring much about others. C called me a selfish brat and she’s mentioned in previous blog comments that she was very angry with me.I was not sulking with C, I was sulking with the world. Everyone I saw and interacted with managed to annoy me in one way or another. There’s lots of things in my past life that make me this way and most of the time I’m a regular guy. I think its the combination of stress at work, memories of bad personal experiences that makes me like this. Unfortunately the people that get the brunt of my moods are the ones I love the most: my darling C and my daughter.
C tolerated this behaviour for a few more days than she should have, but eventually she gave me a tongue lashing which I basically pointed out I was being moody and selfish, she was really angry with and when she calmed down she was going to give me such a spanking.
The combination of C being vocal with me (it wasn’t an argument), the promise of a punishment and a good quantity of alcohol kinda snapped me out of the mood. A few days later C bent me over the benchboard and punished my bare bum with the black leather slapper. Its a relatively light implement and with 10 hard strokes delivered from each side made a small impression – nothing really to get in a wriggle about. It was afterwards still lying over the benchboard waiting for the command to getup that a huge wave of emotion came over me and I really felt like letting fo and crying. Its the only time C has managed to punish me and make me cry.
I’ve seen a few other articles that discuss depression and domestic discipline. A while ago I stumbled across this one from Loki on Firm & Loving Domestic Discipline and just last night I visited DisciplinedBehaviour where Michael gets himself sorted out. Sara from Finding Sara has this to say and provides some though provoking ideas on why it works.
We have been talking about the whole moody thing since and I pointed out that I know I get depressed and sulk and the thing that will probably keep us together is our domestic discipline lifestyle. We have all the mechanisms in place for C to “sort” me out. “This domestic discipline arrangement is for the next five years” she reminds me. Its a good thing, because at this point we’re engaged and by the end of 2013 we will be married.
C is someone I really feel comfortable with and spending the rest of my life with her. If she has to punish me from time to time then it is for the collective good and the harder she punishes the better it will probably be. If she had a flaw, then it would be that she finds it difficult to punish me hard enough because of her love. However through time and reading this blog, reading about likeminded people I’ve noticed a slight progressive increase in punishments. What used to be a couple of almost apologetic slaps is now more formal affair. You did something wrong, you WILL be punished. A sore bottom or 10 is a small price to pay for a lifetime of happiness.